my personal trainer told me i wasn't able to concentrate today...
he was really nice and tried to find out what's wrong with me
but i had no idea... like i just had an empty mind
so i just said, "i dunno" and shrugged my shoulders

i think something's wrong cuz i feel numb...

today when i was watering garden at home and texting with a friend i met at the gym,
he texted me something that made me felt emotional...
he said that he would work hard to make money just to go to places that i like with me

sometimes i feel down and alone when no one talks to me
but his words reminded me that even though i can't feel people's love at the moment doesn't mean that no one cares about me...
though it's really really hard to think in this way when i'm depressed...
i'll try to work on it... i really have to think more optimistically, instead of thinking "oh... no one cares blah blah blah" and sinking into an ultimate depressing cycle

:/ i dunno... ah still get tons of stuff to deal with...

cya