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Jan 27, 2012

as expected, i kinda screwed up the interview...
i was so nervous that i had no idea what i was talking about.
i bet the professor was super confused.... ;(

he wanted me to read some other papers from his group and critically analyze it for next week.
i guess i didn't critically analyzed the paper in my powerpoint and presentation.

man, after the interview i just felt so so so depressed
i feel like there's no hope at all.
i can't see my future in all aspect.
and it's still true right now.
i can't see my future... no matter how hard i try...

i just want to go somewhere and party and dance and have fun right now.
sadly i'm just a stupid little 19 years old kid.


so i decided to go to have a haircut because having my hair cut always gives me a feeling of a fresh start.
i want a new look.
and i like my haircut of course.


had dinner at the Pho place by myself and met a friend i met last year. she lived in mercer hall as well.
we had some talk and she's glad to meet me because otherwise she'd be having dinner herself.
i guess this is something good right?

and after i was back to my room
i just couldn't sit and concentrate on anything
so i decided to dump out all the trash in the bathroom and in the kitchen and in my room.
i think it helped to calm my depression?

seem like there's really nothing else to do... oh well, i'll just study then.
and since i have bio midterm next friday and more paper to read for next week.
i think i have to start studying in spite it's friday night and i've been working so hard all the weekdays.

:/

2 comments:

  1. Only one "virtual" failure shouldn't knock you down. Failure is too usual Ito everyone everyday. Major part of my daily job is to fix or solve the problems that we created or faced. So, it is just something that we need to face everyday. It is not such a big deal. It just made you feel frustrated after all the efforts you made. Prepare for next try!!!!

    I can provide you experience for my presentation. Even now, I still got nervous when I need to step up and face many of my colleagues. My secret is to focus on the content that I present. Another secret is to ignore the audience. Just pretend that they are not there and no one will remember how you present after the event. Both secrets keep me successful on my presenteion even facing a few hundred of audience.

    Cheers, practice my secrets and try it for your next interview.
    Dad

    ReplyDelete
  2. thanks!! i'm getting better i think.
    just have to work really hard from now till, i dunno, the end of the quarter?

    ReplyDelete