busy week

hey guys
sorry i've been super busy with research
have been running back and forth between Foege and SLU
I have two experiment running simultaneously
next week i'm going to start two more experiments
that means there will be four!!!
cells are looking better and better, so I guess i'm doing something right...

had my midterm this monday
i got 80 and the average was 76
so i guess i did well.
could be better though.

also i've been pretty depressed since the past 2 weeks
have been a little dramatic. had some arguments with the bf
went in for my appointment with my doctor and he prescribed me another medication called bupropion damn so many pills
also went in for my appointment with my counselor
we talked about how i can feel better about myself as well as ways to improve my relationship with my bf.

Pessimism

Today I woke and the first thing I saw was another rejection from my job application

Then my day proceed to be alright.

Went to had lunch then the fire alarm went off so I had to bring my lunch to somewhere else and finish it

Being so productive so far

I hope the rest of the day will go well but I doubt it.

Also I just called our state representative about internet neutrality through tumblr. 

Hate corporations.

Also I found these around the campus

That's why I don't care about football or sports in general. They're all just about the money.

week 5: some updates

got an email back from the company i applied to. they said no.
so i applied 5 positions today (of different companies)
hopefully I would hear some good news in the next few weeks.

stomach wasn't happy for three days since last friday, but it's recovered now.
i guess i have been drinking too much last week. last week was soooooo eventful, i need alcohol to socialize though :(
wednesday was wells, friday was house party, saturday had double date at Umi and party at Q, and Sunday was super bowl.

been very busy with research.
new cells have not been doing well :(
sigh
i'll just keep doing more experiments
hopefully everything would work out.

damn it's week 5 already....

week 3 is almost over

class is going well. enjoy it a lot.
love taking one class so i have more time and my schedule is a lot more flexible.

lab is going alright.
starting experimenting with another cell type cuz the cells I'm working with right now is being a big bitch.

and guess what? I booked the tickets going to Taiwan this June with my bf!
i'm so excited to show him around where i grew up.
he's also never been to Asia so it will definitely be a fun trip for him.

there're ups and downs in my personal life.
recently, i've been a bit more irritated.

I've started my therapy today with my psychiatrist
I like her a lot and i think we will work really well together
the session today was great. I think i know where a lot of my issues are coming from
because the only source of my social interaction and attention is from my bf. whenever, he's not paying enough attention to me, i feel jealous.
also I've had a twin brother (which is like my best friend) for such a long time, I don't know how to approach other and make friends.
I also have jealous and bitterness issue of others.

today she gave me a task of writing down things that make me unhappy and things that make me happy
and we're going to analyze them together when i meet with her next week.
i hope my therapy will help me to become a better person :)

week 1 is almost over

so far i've been super productive on my first week of school.
i had a good break so i'm completely ready for this quarter
i'm taking only one class BIOEN 577 cell and protein interaction.
i like it and i'm going to learn so much from the class.

because i'm taking only one class i have so much time to do things i want to do.

have been working in lab too.
gotta get some nice data this quarter or else i'm screwed.

let's see what else...
oh i will also be starting mental therapy soon
i really want to be a happy person... depression is not fun.

oh and i'm slowly working out my schedule
i want to start working out too.

another year passed hello 2015

looking back, its been an even better year! let's review my resolutions for 2014:

:(   1. yet again, keep gaining weight. keep eating and working out.
comment: I did not work out at all this year. damn it. still too skinny i wanna gain some more muscle

:) 2. make major steps in personal life
comment: yup, I did. I came out to my family (my brother, my mom, and dad) and introduced them to my bf and things went really well really surprisingly.

:) 3. keep up with my good work in lab and school like get more scholarship
comment: yup, i'm in the BS/MS program now. got another scholarship in March or something i think. I've also applied to a job.

:) 4. be a happier person. work on my personal issues like anxiety.
comment: yes, I went to the doctor and was diagnosed with depression. i've been taking medication and trying to learn to be more content.

my 2015 resolutions:
1. yet again, keep gaining weight. keep eating and working out
2. finish my masters degree and find a job
3. keep in touch with my family more (since i've come out and there's no reason to hide)
4. fight depression

watch two more movies

Primer was so deep. it's from the same director of Upstream Color.

The Congress was a beautiful movie.
I am in love with this movie.

watch two more movies

i watch two more movies last night

Upstream Color
and
Another Earth

both are them are beautiful.
upstream color is incredibly deep.
another earth is really deep too. they have so much meaning behind what is presented in the film.

I miss chandler so much

Have been pretty productive. Got some research stuff done also finalized the class grade.

Have been watching a movie every night

I watched Lucy, Melancholia, and Chronicle.

My favorite is Melancholia.

It's just so melancholic I can relate to it so much.

it's December

oh my gosh guys sorry i've been updating the blog as i used to...
my blog used to be where i talked about my feelings but now i've come out and have a bf
i don't express my feeling on the blog as often

it's been more than a month since my last post.

i've been pretty busy with school, grading stuff, and research.
now i'm pretty much done for the quarter.
now i just have to finalize the grades for my class
the classes i took this quarter were all really interesting.
however, one of them is super difficult (the imaging one).
but i managed to finished the last homework.
the other class was not too bad.

it's fun being a grader. i get to know the students and keep myself busy
(sometimes really busy, like i need to stay at my office until 10 pm to finished grading midterms)
also the students all respect me and i like that :P

research isn't going really well.
my samples were molded.
i need to do another experiment soon but i will be gone during most of the winter break.

i went to Virginia for my bf's godfather's wedding.
i had lots of fun. but got too drunk during the wedding night.... :P

throughout the thanksgiving i went to my bf's house and saw his parents.
it's always good to see his family.
i finished whole bottle of wine one of the night
and managed to finish two bottle another night.
haha i'm such a drinker.

anyway, i've come to enjoy red wine so much. it tastes soon good with cheese.

now my bf is gone for a business trip and i just chilling.
miss him so much already.