horrible day in Seattle

as you may see on the news.

4 were killed in one day here in Seattle in this terrible event.

i received an email from police department warning us and describing the appearance of the suspect.

3 killed in a cafe north of UW this morning
and a woman is killed sometime this morning in downtown.
then the scene moved down to west Seattle.

i'm watching news live on the internet now.

i think the suspect killed himself.

one of my lab partner said her neighbor is surrounded by police and SWAT.

and helicopters are all over the place.

D: horrible.

i'll update you more when more information is confirmed.

-----------------------------

for now, the events are probably all connected.
5 are killed
3 are injured.

-----------------

it's confirmed.

the events are all related.
all done by the same shooter.
the shooter has shot himself.

---------------

my heart goes to people who were killed.

new photos

last batch of photos from Dayglow

just in case you're interested in the video i watched.

procrastination!

saturday.

woke up at 12 something and decided i should sleep more than that.
so went back to sleep and woke up at 2 something.

woke up took a shower.

finished my bio reading such a huge relief!!!
and starting my bioen 315 reading.

just got my din din from Thai 65.
and yeh... not much to say.

a little depressed

but on my way back i  saw my roommate and his gf and they smiled and waved hi to me. i smiled and waved back. and this made my day :)
sorry it's just a little thing but it really made my day.

friday

i mean like lab works are fine to me i like them
like i get a sense of accomplishment when i made samples successfully and the learning process is fun

but school works suck
sometime, no matter how much time and effort you put into studying for a test or whatever
you don't get a good grade and it's just stupid and depressing and frustrating.

i don't know.
i still have bio reading and a bunch of 315 reading and 315 homework and 317 lab report and i heard there'll be a 316 homework next week.
oh man...
i got 70% for my third bio midterm the average was around 60%
i mean like i got above average but still this is not a good score. i can do much better than this.
but like i put so much effort studying for bio and i got 70%...

and today there's a quiz for 316
and i totally screwed it up because i have no time to study for it or whatever.
i don't know.

i'm really tired of school work especially 316 stuff like i don't really know where to start
whatever it's almost summer.

last week. FINALLY!

new photos from Dayglow

rainy rainy

on my way back to dorm and thought i was able to jump over a puddle but nope.

the puddle thanked me with a splash

i want to draw :D
might get a pen for drawing on computer.
drawing with trackpad is hard.

in response to my depressing post

whether things are going to get better or not depends on me.

it's me who make things better or worse.

my mood is fluctuating so much :P

so i went to my honor society initiation
and met so many of my bioen people!!
talked to them a bit well more like listening :)
yeh feeling a little better now.

i think i know what went wrong.

because i was the one who was responsible for the printout of the bio lab last week
but apparently i did not read the instruction
so our group ended up getting 7/14
it's my fault and this is a big deal for people like me
because i really really care about how other people think about me.
and yeh making a mistake is the worst especially when the group depends on me.

but i think i'm over it now.

should continue my bio study!
i'm like finishing up the reading :D
hopefully i can get bio reading done asap
and start other stuff ;)

feeling like shit again...

that feeling.

i feel like i can't go on anymore.
why am i messing up stuff so frequently?
why am i always so alone?

stop saying things will get better because it won't.

i don't even feel excited for summer anymore.
it's just going to be the same. depressing.

gosh i just want to be 21 and go have fun.
stupid 20. i can't do anything at 20. i'm just another stupid kid
and seriously, no one cares about a stupid kid.

photos from Dayglow

photos of me credit goes to Frances!







omg i miss the party already!!
had so much fun!

2 weeks to go! :D

summer here i come!

just got back form the lab! woohoo late night lab!

yup just made 20 glass stuff!

precursor to my party photos

triple exposure with kodak disposable.
you can do the same by charging up the flash and then smash the camera on your palm.
:D fun!

films developed. i have the photos!

they look awesome!!!
i'll start uploading them to flickr!

and of course it's raining here in seattle

no solar eclipse for us :/

Dayglow

"Hey I just got back
And that was crazy
So write a blog entry maybe ;)"

The party was awesome!!!
Got paint all over my body! My face looked so colorful!! Red green and blue!

Dayglow love it!

I was rather well prepared I guess.
Had my stuff in plastics bags do the paint won't get on my stuff
And I had a little disposable backpack.
Had three Kodak disposable camera.
Wear shorts and a t-shirt and a matching blue sunglasses which I bought just before the party in the annual street fair.

So Frances and I met up and took the bus to Wamu. And there ravers on the bus going to Dayglow as well. And of course we yelled and screamed.

We were there early around 8 ish
We waited in line and got in in a fairly short time.

During the party we slowly moved our way to the front of the crowd in order to get paint all over our body.
we got in front of the crowd but it's way to squishy and people were pushing around and stuff.

So when we had enough paint we got out and found out that they were selling paint in bottles!!!

We bought three bottles and then got back into the crowd and sprayed it crazy!!!
People were like oh yeh spray it on me.
And yeh danced with awesome music from benny benassi and sprayed paint with the beats of the music which was really fun!! I just stand and then had the bottle in the air and then just squeezed the bottle as I spin around and people around me would scream.

There were super nice people who told me that my bag was open.
But actually my bag was broken when we were in the front of the crowd as I said its super über squishy. So I told them that my bag was broken and said thank you to them!

Also help a few people took photos. Maybe they saw me with the Kodak disposable camera.
I ended up using up 1 of the camera and half of the other one ad maybe 1/3 of the third one.
Not much photos but I can't wait to see what I got on those films!!! Gonna go develop them tmr!!

Music was great not perfect though.
There only 3 DJs. So yeh... But still I love the music so much!! EDM FTW!

And so here are some music I recalled they played.
Satisfaction, cinema, call me maybe remix, take over control remix, forever young remix,
Oh oh and Tetris remix which was sick!!

Yup.
Just took a shower after we rode a taxi back.
Washing te paint away felt so good and bad at the same time.
Felt relieved and clean but I just washed away all the achievements I made :/

Anyway more updates tomorrow maybe

EDM FTW
Ravers FTW
:D

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parteh pls

deh gloe in a few moar huors!! cant wait to seh benny benashi!! :D

friday.

yes finally!
i'm done for the week
had my 315 midterm today. it went well i guess though i didn't have time to finish the whole thing.
the grade is out already. they're so fast.
i got 82 and the average is 86.... wtf... i thought i am going to kick some ass but apparently not...
oh well.

went to lab today
it's the forge lab not the slu lab.

time to relax!
watching adventure time
and yeh.
nothing else.
and parted tomorrow!! :D

wednesday

didn't get enough sleep last night.
woke up super tired this morning and have no time for shower...
felt like throwing up but but but!!! after i ate some stuff like oatmeal i felt a lot better!
note to myself, try to eat something when you get stomachache. it might help.
and my cold is getting better :D no sore throat anymore

anyway, turned in my 316 hw today, had 316 quiz, had boil midterm.
i accomplished a lot today. though i wouldn't say any of them was awesome. at least i'm done with them which is a great great relief!!

now i still have a 315 hw due tonight and 315 midterm on friday.

i tried my best to think positively and smile and it works great!
i'm supposed to be stressed out and depressed right now but i'm not sad at all which is super odd haha
love this feeling.

omg love the weather
it's been sunny for so many days! enjoyed the sun so much.
glad i don't have to wake up without the sun.

and recently we have been talking about social jet lag in our biology class
it's super cool.
like we are all messing up our biological clock with the social clock.
and it's really bad.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Delayed_sleep_phase_syndrome

and i also found this while searching for social jet lag online
it's called cultural jet lag
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cultural_jet_lag

they generally have the feeling that they remain outside the culture, looking in. They do not experience the same drives, desires and constraints as other non-TCK members of their cultures and feel like constant spectators to any visceral dynamic (patriotism, identification, national pride, duty, allegiance, sports fan, political involvement etc.)

plus my room is super messy...

I really have to get myself together... like really...
it's a hellish week and don't give up! summer is almost here!
well, not almost...
i don't sense time based on time scale
but i sense time based on work scale.
the more work there is the longer the week it feels.
so yeh, it's gonna be another month till the end of this week.
and another month till summer.

just wasted more than half of can of tuna D:

i like left it open for the whole afternoon and now it smells super awful...

D:

what have I been doing since the start of week 8!??

MISERABLE!!!

OMG!! this is not going to be a fun week at all...

so i have a 317 lab report due tuesday,
a long 315 homework due wednesday,
a 316 homework due wednesday,
biol 220 midterm wednesday,
316 quiz wednesday,
and a 315 midterm friday....

o_O.....

i can't focus....
feel so lost and empty right now...
plus i'm sick right now...

What the...

I'm sick... Again!!!
Sore throat and yeh it's awful.
Why you getting sick on the week with 2 midterms!!??

So yeh I skipped all the classes today!!! I skipped all the classes!!!
Super tired.

And I still have a lab report due tomorrow and a long homework due wednesday...
I just feel like I can't do it anymore....


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

holy crap!! i got one more photo explored on Flickr!!

it's also from my New York trip!

it's this photo


3 photos explored on Flickr from my New York trip! gotta thank Andrew, my brother, for taking me to his favorite New York viewing spot! :D

beer, cigarettes, and blackberry

friday night was fun.
went to a house party.
music was ok coming straight out from iPod.
dun like beer :( so much gas. felt sick after like 2 cups of beer.
i'd rather do shots.
and yeh talked around a bit. well not really... like i just sat around and smiled and listened to what people were talking about. you know... i'm not very talktive but i like listening to people :D
well we played some drinking games which were pretty fun.

after that i walked back to dorm with Alex, a friend who is also in bioe and is one of the officer of the honor society.
anyway.

got back at 2 something. and went to bed.
woke up at 7:40 am this morning cuz i'm doing community service in order to get in the honor society.
so yeh. hard work! work around with shovels and clippers.
our goal is to remove invading species like blackberry and holly. yup!

and yeh saw Alex again! hope i'll get to know her more!

i was thinking of just taking a shower and go to bed again since i've only slept for 4 hours
but!!! after all the hard labor, i'm not sleepy anymore.
and
weather is SUPER SUPER SUPER NICE!!
so warm and sunny! must have my shorts and flip-flops on and head outside and enjoy the sun.
i'll probably study outside. :D

excited!

party tonight.
dunno if there'll be awesome music or not. but there'll definitely be drinks :D
me wanna dance and have tons of fun!!!

can't wait till tonight!!
just got back from lab. better study now. 2 midterms next week!

two more photos explored on Flickr!!! :D

thanks for all your support!!

one more place added to my to-go list

it's the Monuments in Bulgaria
http://www.archdaily.com/101626/forgotten-monuments-from-the-communist-era-in-bulgaria/

awesome place
look at this awesome structure.

new photos

so i have not much to talk about
so much to work on
so much to think of
so much to worry about.









basically, they are just paris of color and black and white. :D enjoy
this is my last batch of NYC trip photos.

dayglow here i come!

dayglow is coming up in less than 2 weeks!!

and the cameras i ordered online is here!

disposable ones! so retro!

it's gonna be fun! 

btw

i got 70.5 on bio midterm 2
median of class was 68.
i guess i did better this time but i'm not satisfied. :(

deep very deep.

comic by Zach Weiner
http://www.smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=2603#comic

depressed again.

have been looking everywhere on the web.
searching for an answer to my problem.

i think i had a panic attack last night when i was talking to my mom over ichat.
like we talked about what i have to do over the summer and stuff
and i just felt like short of breath and pacing heart
tired and angry

and today, i had stomachache. felt like throwing up most of the time. got a little better now.
and for the whole day, i just didn't feel like talking to anyone. i even avoided some conversations.
felt empty the whole day. and things just got worse when i think more about my life and stuff...

i started to realize that this is a recurring issue.
once in a while, i just feel like this. emptiness, sadness, worthless...

i don't know....

i should pick myself up but it's so hard...

and smoking is definitely not a solution
and yes, i put my cigarettes on my shelf the whole day in my room so no smoking until the next social occasion.

let me try to interact with people
by chance i'm talking to people on Facebook now and he stopped replying.
ok...
um...

i have no one to related to.

weekend

finished homework and stuff and did some reading for biology
still have much much reading to do :(

seriously can't wait for summer.

here are some new photos

good friday

though the weather wasn't that great as expected...
i had a great day overall.

went to my first class late (haha have been late to most of my first class this week, super tired when i woke up)
and handed in that god damn homework.

now i'm mostly free from homework.
yeh mostly, but not all free from homework. i still have a lab report due on tuesday.
and i think new homework is going to come up this weekend.

great time to do some reading and catch up with stuff
i decided not to catch up with the first part of the biology course, the plant part.
it's not going to be on final, so whatever.

had lunch near by George and met Tinny, she's our bioengineering mentor.
we chatted a bit. glad i've talked to her. she has so much insights. and actually have someone to talk to feels great.

and went to lab afterwards.
lab went well too.
made so many substrates today and talked to some of my lab people.

hope i'll get to know them even more in the next few weeks!

just had dinner at pho on the ave and back to dorm now.
pumping the music! feel like clubbing!! :D

oh oh and so next saturday, i believe, there's going to be a party hosted by Tau Beta Pi. hope it's going to be fun! can't wait!! (sorry for being such a party lover :P)
and going to Dayglow with Frances the week after Tau Beta Pi party! it's a super huge paint party where people throw paint at each other while dancing in Benny Banassi's music! it's going to be freaking awesome!!

yay! party all the way!

meh

finally finished my 316 hw.
and yeh ended up spending too much time on it and doing parts that are not necessary.
whatever, at least i'm done with it now.
went to photo club today finally!! so happy to see John and Ben.

here are some new photos

feeling better

so me and my friends from Mercer hall had dinner and watched a movie together.
feel great to just stop thinking of all those shit.

we watch "Thank you for Smoking"
really interesting movie, since i'm smoking lately haha!

i don't know anymore....

the homework is so frustrating!!!
i've been working on it for like 3 days and still can't figure out that freaking cutoff frequency >:(
and i seriously need to start my reading for biology!! and biochem!!! and everything!!!

AHHHHHHHH!!! WHY!!!!!?????